So this is it for me. It's been a fun year, but I think I need a serious break to put my priorities in order. Sadly, writing isn't one of those priorities any longer.
My Color Who am I?My Color by eienhikaru
I used to know the answer. But now, no matter how many masks I take off I can never feel the same emotions that I had as I child. I can tell you how someone else feels. I can tell you why they act the way they do. I can string together a story with just a glance at someone.
I just can’t tell you a story about myself. Because I don’t even know myself anymore.
I wonder when it started. When did I lose sight of myself in my search to create something the world would love?
I’d hear something, see something, feel something, and try to put it into words. With a palette called experience, every time something caught my interest, I’d add another stroke to the canvas of my story.
At some point, I forgot what color I started with. Instead, the canvas was a blinding multicolored mess. I could see countless stories on its surface, but none of them were mine.
So who was I?
What was my story?
Of all the colors on the canvas, which one was mine?
When They Came (Shingeki no Kyojin FF)The sun was far in the western sky when the shadow blotted out its light. We thought that it was from a cloud when we first saw and heard the thunder and lightning that shook heaven and earth. It was the coming of the rain, we thought. But that sound was of a different storm, one that would bring no life to a starving land. It was the sound of death’s footsteps.When They Came (Shingeki no Kyojin FF) by eienhikaru
Then the devil raised its head above the wall and looked down on us. In its gleaming hungry eyes, we were just livestock penned in and waiting to be eaten. But even though death was right there staring in on us, we were rooted to the spot by a feeling of awe and terror. That feeling lasted but a moment though before our worst fears came true. With its face a steaming mask of bare muscle and grinning teeth, the red devil with clamped his hand down on the edge of the wall and squeezed. Cracks split the wall where his fingers held it, a prelude to the end.
Seconds later, an ungodly force tore through the wall and sent rubble
The DiverThe difference between dreams and reality is that dreams are ultimately just that, dreams. We can wake up from them. But then, what about reality? When reality is as bad as a nightmare, can we wake from that?The Diver by eienhikaru
Then maybe we should ask, is there a middle ground, something that sits between the mists of the dream world and the rough concrete of the real world?
Aye. There is. There most certainly is.
A murky, watery world, bottomless and without limits. That, my friend, is the world of the dive. Imagine an empty void, dark as the never ending night of space. Plunge yourself into it. Sink your mind into that void and let the darkness take you.
That is where your dive begins. As your eyes close and the feeling of your real body fades away to nothingness, your soul plummets into the void in an uncontrolled fall. No one knows where you’ll stop, no one knows if you’ll stop. Maybe you’ll never return. But if there wasn’t a little bit of risk, where would the fun be?
The Broken“You always seem to feel responsible for other people, so much that you almost look like you forget yourself at times. You’re putting others before yourself, but you ignore the problems in your own life while trying to help other people solve theirs. That’s not a bad thing, but… I think you’re mixing up your priorities. Maybe it’s a reflection upon your own life. Maybe you feel like if you can’t solve your own problems, you should instead make up for it by trying to help other people. And that’s fine, I guess, but…”The Broken by eienhikaru
“But…? What’s your point?” I try to hold a neutral expression while looking back at her. It isn’t easy. Not when the words are true. To try and keep myself focused, I clench my fists tightly. Because that’s totally going to keep my mind on this conversation, right?
“Don’t you ever get tired of it? You’ve got your own problems. In fact, why are you even trying